College Football Writers Everywhere to Bill Plaschke: "SHUT THE HELL UP!"

Compliments of Signal to Noise is today's case of sports stupidity. Exhibit A: Bill Plaschke from the L.A. Times. Aw, hell, who am I kidding - you know him solely from his work with this douchebag on That Show Before PTI.

Anyways, Plaschke decided to issue his take on the current state of college football today (yesterday, whenever the hell it is now). There is nothing that can be said besides the fact that the man is living in the relative sports stone age.

Plaschke bemoans the fact that college football is not what it used to be because of the lack of dominant programs this year:

It may be fair, it may even be occasionally fun, but it's just not right.

This is a USC-Notre Dame show, for Knute's sake!

The bear of a game should have been Alabama-Tennessee!

Shouldn't we be circling that brawl that is Miami-Florida State?

Those three traditionally great games will be played Saturday, yet none of them will probably figure into the national championship race, so all eyes will be on Piscata-whatever tonight to watch the Who'sthats battle the Somethingoranothers.

OK, fine. If you're an open-minded person (not I), maybe you'll bite. However, where Plaschke really gets me is with this gem of a line:

Boise State's win over Oklahoma last winter was wonderful, but it couldn't compare to the shock of Florida's stomping over Ohio State, and the awe of LSU's crushing of Notre Dame.

Excuse me? It couldn't compare? Are you kidding me?!?!?! Boise State's win was easily one of the most exciting anythings I had seen in a long time. Meanwhile, not even Brady Quinn was excited about the game he freaking played in, and given the choice, he probably would have turned off his TV about as early as I did. I did actually watch Florida's game all the way to the end, but only because I legitimately didn't believe what I saw, and by no means did it compare to the amazing display put on the week prior.

Way to look at just the box scores, Bill Plaschke. I await the tears that come from you when another powerhouse close to home struggles in the college hoops season.

The Sunday Hangover: Ohio State?!?!?!?! Edition

Note: This is where I'll review the weekend that was in college football - and NOT just a review of the top 25, either. I actually do pay attention to the rest of the nation too, y'know. Usually this'll go on here at a slightly earlier hour to be more immediate for college football fans, but I slacked off more than a little bit this week. Sorry.

Normally I don't like to give a lot of attention to the teams at the top of the heap that already dominate the headlines, but the fact is that it's impossible to truly talk about it without mentioning the two biggest upsets of the weekend.

First to fall was LSU, the previously undisputed top team in the nation. Les Miles' fourth-down luck/stubbornness finally backfired on him, as his Tigers fell to the wildly under-appreciated Kentucky Wildcats.

This left the Cal Golden Bears sitting pretty to take over the top spot in the polls, so long as they could just take care of Oregon State. Enter Kevin Riley.

Listen, I realize he's just a kid, but come on. The kid single-handedly blew it for his team by somehow thinking that he could've run for a first down, or a touchdown, or something when his team just needed to kick a field goal to head to overtime. The fact is this - as of right now, Kevin Riley officially has no friends, and whether he has any family is debatable at best.

So now as a result, the Ohio State Buckeyes are the top team in the land. Really? Ohio State? The best team in the land? I'll believe that when I see it.

With no further ado, the weekend in review!

STOCK RISING: Everybody who had the Kansas Jayhawks as the last unbeaten team in the Big 12, raise your hand. Thought so. The Jayhawks continued their tear, destroying Baylor 58-10 in Lawrence. I realize it's Baylor and not any other team in the Big 12 South, but come on. 48 points is the kind of domination that we expect from the top teams in the nation playing lesser foes. More importantly, things are shaping up nicely for a potential final-week neutral-site showdown between Kansas and Mizzou for a berth in the Big 12 title game.

STOCK FALLING: What a weekend to forget for the Hawaii Warriors and Heisman prettyboy Colt Brennan. The Warriors needed overtime to knock off San Jose State on Friday night, and that was only after Hawaii scored two touchdowns in four minutes to send the game to OT in the first place. The fallout? Brennan's four picks makes him an unlikely Heisman winner at this point, Hawaii falls one spot in the AP polls, and a combination of a #18 ranking in the initial BCS standings and a lack of a meaty schedule possibly dooms June Jones' boys to miss the BCS even if they run the table. The way they've been playing though, does anybody scream too loudly if they d0?

HUH?: Do not adjust your monitor: Temple has won two games in a row. The Owls came from behind to knock off Akron 24-20, notching their first pair of consecutive wins in five years. With an upset of MAC East Division-leading Miami (Ohio) next week, Temple would pick up its first three-game winning streak in five years. Don't automatically bet against it, either - Temple was also one botched call away from beating one-loss UConn and having three wins at this point.

GAME OF THE WEEK: And just barely making it into this week's edition, too! Apparently Nevada and Boise State weren't impressed by LSU and Kentucky going to triple overtime. The Wolf Pack and Broncos combined for 136 points, 1266 yards and four extra sessions in another shining example of great non-BCS football.

BIG MAN ON CAMPUS: After being essentially left for dead, Virginia Tech QB Sean Glennon relieved freshman sensation Tyrod Taylor in the Hokies' game against Duke and looked damn impressive, going 16-for-21 for 258 yards and 2 TDs. Yes, it was Duke, but the Blue Devils are better than they have been for quite a while, and the Sean Glennon of old couldn't have looked this good.

PUBLIC ENEMY #1: Because it would be way too easy to take anyone on the LSU or Cal sidelines: Dave Wannstedt, whatever were you thinking? With the Pittsburgh Panthers down three in the second overtime against Navy and facing a 3rd-and-Goal from the 2, Wannstedt draws up a pass play, avoiding handing the ball off to workhorse back LeSean McCoy, who had been averaging more than five yards per carry. After calling a timeout, Wannstedt decided to go for it on 4th down - AND THREW THE BALL AGAIN. Predictably, Pitt lost 48-45. Two problems with this. First, why send the message that you have absolutely no faith in your team to finish the game if it goes any further? Second, why not use your stud running back as you had 32 times before? Rarely do you see a coach botch an endgame situation this badly.

Like I said, we'll try and get this on slightly more timely next time. College football will return here on Thursday, barring a story of epic proportions before now and then.